MYTH: Partner abuse does not happen among LGBT+ people.
FACT: Partner abuse can happen within intimate partner relationships where one or more persons identify as LGBT+. Partner abuse does not discriminate and occurs proportionally across all groups, subgroups and categories of people. Victims and abusers come from all cultures, sexual orientations, gender identities, socioeconomic classes, ages, religions and political beliefs.
MYTH: Partner abuse is about size and strength; for example a gay male victim will be smaller and more effeminate and an abusive lesbian will be more masculine.
FACT: Partner abuse is not about size or strength, or who looks more masculine. By definition a perpetrator of domestic abuse is someone who is or has been using violence, abuse, force, threat, coercive control and instilling fear towards a family member, intimate partner or ex-partner. Abuse is about gaining power and control over another person, regardless of who the person is, how a person looks or their gender or sexual identity.
MYTH: Sexual abuse doesn't happen in intimate relationships among LGBT+ people; a woman cannot rape another woman and men cannot be raped.
FACT: Sexual violence does happen in same-sex intimate relationships. Sexual abuse in same-sex relationships can be as severe as among heterosexual couples and can include:
- Unwanted advances
- Unwanted sexual contact
- Rape
- Forced sex
- Intentional exposure to HIV or sexually transmitted infections
- Withholding sex in order to gain control
In approaching support services, LGBT+ victims and survivors may have to deal with the added shame of being the target of sexual violence from someone within their own community.
MYTH: Partner abuse among LGBT+ people is not as serious in nature compared with experiences of their heterosexual cisgender peers.
FACT: Partner abuse is not more common in heterosexual relationships. UK research suggests that more than one in four gay men and lesbian women and more than one in three bisexual people report at least one form of domestic abuse since the age of 16. While lesbian women report similar rates of domestic abuse to that of heterosexual women, gay and bisexual men might be twice as likely to experience domestic abuse compared to heterosexual men. National statistics also suggest bisexual women are twice as likely to disclose intimate partner violence compared to heterosexual women. Although more limited in number, studies suggest that transgender people may be experiencing similar if not higher levels of domestic abuse compared to LGBT+ men and women and cisgender people.
Intercom Trust runs the Safer Rainbow Project and can provide advice, support and help if you have experienced any kind of intimate partner abuse or violence.
