Respect is an organisation that works closely with those people who are abusive towards others, who recognise it and who want to do something about it.
They have a confidential helpline for anyone, male or female, who is concerned that their behaviour may be abusive and the helpline operators will listen to you and offer you honest, non judgemental, advice. They also run online webchat Weds, Thurs and Friday (times vary) and contact by email. Open the conversation in a way you're comfortable with. You can find out more on the Respect website
Torbay Domestic Abuse Service can provide advice and information relating to perpetrator programmes.
If you have a Probation Officer or have a support worker via Youth Offending Team, speak with them as support with changing your behaviour may be available through them.
The Ministry of Defence has produced guidance around domestic abuse where either the person causing the harm or their victim is a member of the armed forces and includes a range of information relating to family and support options. The guidance also contains information on the impact this can have on your career and suggestions on getting support.